Praise Lord Dave

Today, the ace Mark Steel, whose work I bloody love loads, did a column in the Sunday Mirror: 

Then Songs of Praise tweeted that his idea for a new hymn sounded like a good plan.

I agreed and knocked this up with some lyrics taken from said column, and it looks and sounds like this.

With all due credit to Mark Steel for the inspiration and nihilism.

I gave the copyright in this to God to avoid smiting.

Bringing Parcels Forth to Man, 

Praise Lord Dave Who Drives the Van

Grandma tell us how you went

All the way to Stockport? When

Granddad sent you an emoji

Every Christmas time?

Nasa save us one and all

Astronauts land in Cornwall.

Bringing Parcels Forth to Man, 

Praise Lord Dave Who Drives the Van

Trees with voices sing with joy.

Parties with one girl, one boy.

Watch out for the edge of Swindon

No-one makes it back.

Finnish question-masters reigned

Til the kitten masters came.